Credit to Life's Teachers

Everyone that comes into your life teaches you something - about people, about the world, and about yourself. Some people who enter your life encourage your growth through a positive relationship with you - mentoring and guiding you through good and bad times, sharing your successes and failures. These people are easily classified into the "good" category and they have important places in our hearts. It's very easy to love these people and to speak well of them.

Other people, however, speed up your growth through having a negative relationship with you. Perhaps you have never gotten along with these people. Or perhaps it began positively but then the relationship sours by circumstances or misunderstandings. These people are easily classified into the "bad" category and often you'd just rather forget that these people even exist. It's very easy to hate these people and to speak ill of them.

What is it about the latter category of people that are so difficult? Whereas the former category of people do things with good intentions towards you, those in the latter category may not have intentions quite so pure. Sometimes even with intentions to harm. These people challenge your beliefs and self-perceptions. Perhaps they accuse you of things that you wouldn't in a million years agree with. Or perhaps they spread their ill-will towards you on to others. Whatever it is, it's never easy to deal with.

What is one's natural reaction towards these people? To defend oneself, to retaliate, and even to hate.

Why is this the case? What is there to protect?

Everyone has a sense of ego - a sense of self. We all have an image of who we are, what we represent. When our sense of 'self' is under attack, we want to protect this 'self'.

A couple of things to think about though...

• Why are they attacking in the first place? Do they have any basis for their attacks? First of all, reflect on your own actions. Put yourself in their shoes - would you react the same way if you were them? Most of the time people don't start attacking for no reason - there has to be better things to do in life than making random attacks. If that is the case, there are lessons to be learnt. What could you have done differently? This is by no means an easy feat - taking a good look at yourself is challenging at the best of times. But this must be done in order to move forward and become a better person for it.
  

• Why is this sense of self so important to us? And why must others agree with our sense of self? Sometimes people go too far and attack just for the hell of it after a while. They can attack all they want but as long as you know who you are and what you are doing - it does not matter what their opinions are if you do not believe them to be true. Often these people can teach you how not to act.
  

Many people come and go in one's lifetime. For better or worse, these people will teach you something. Your experiences shape you into who you are today.

So here's paying credit where credit is due - thank you for the experience.